Selfish Guilt
You feel selfish guilt when you fail to prevent harm to an unfortunate person.
You feel selfish guilt, for example, if you do nothing when you:
Like compassion, selfish guilt requires ability to prevent harm.
If you couldn't help an unfortunate person, you don't feel selfish guilt. You feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see somebody knocked over by a falling tree. You don't feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see somebody knocked to the ground by a falling tree on America's Funniest Videos.
People try to avoid feeling selfish guilt by telling themselves they couldn't help or couldn't make a difference. The friends of suicide victims tell each other there were no signs of depression. If there were no signs, friends could not know their help was needed.
Like compassion, selfish guilt requires misfortune.
If somebody needs help but is not unfortunate, you don't feel selfish guilt. You feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see a man without limbs begging for money. You don't feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see an able-bodied man begging for money.
The more harm you could have prevented, the stronger the selfish guilt you feel.
You will feel selfish guilt if you drive by a stranded motorist gesturing for help. You will feel stronger selfish guilt if the motorist dies of exposure that night.
Selfish guilt is permanent.
You never stop feeling selfish guilt. Every time you think of the person or incident, you will feel selfish guilt. And the individual memories that cause selfish guilt accumulate over a lifetime.
Survivor's guilt is proof that selfish guilt is permanent. Many decades after a war or genocide, survivors still express guilt for "not doing more" to help those that did not survive. It usually makes them cry.
You feel selfish guilt, for example, if you do nothing when you:
- see a man without limbs on the sidewalk begging for money
- see somebody calling for help from a burning house
- see somebody knocked over by a falling tree
- see somebody abusing a weaker person
- see a dog running loose through traffic
Like compassion, selfish guilt requires ability to prevent harm.
If you couldn't help an unfortunate person, you don't feel selfish guilt. You feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see somebody knocked over by a falling tree. You don't feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see somebody knocked to the ground by a falling tree on America's Funniest Videos.
People try to avoid feeling selfish guilt by telling themselves they couldn't help or couldn't make a difference. The friends of suicide victims tell each other there were no signs of depression. If there were no signs, friends could not know their help was needed.
Like compassion, selfish guilt requires misfortune.
If somebody needs help but is not unfortunate, you don't feel selfish guilt. You feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see a man without limbs begging for money. You don't feel selfish guilt if you do nothing when you see an able-bodied man begging for money.
The more harm you could have prevented, the stronger the selfish guilt you feel.
You will feel selfish guilt if you drive by a stranded motorist gesturing for help. You will feel stronger selfish guilt if the motorist dies of exposure that night.
Selfish guilt is permanent.
You never stop feeling selfish guilt. Every time you think of the person or incident, you will feel selfish guilt. And the individual memories that cause selfish guilt accumulate over a lifetime.
Survivor's guilt is proof that selfish guilt is permanent. Many decades after a war or genocide, survivors still express guilt for "not doing more" to help those that did not survive. It usually makes them cry.
Selfish guilt and criminal guilt are different emotions.
While both are negative emotions you feel when somebody else is harmed, they are caused by very different situations. While selfish guilt is caused when you fail to help an unfortunate person, criminal guilt is caused when you harm someone by breaking the rules. You feel selfish guilt when you fail to tell someone their house is on fire. You feel criminal guilt when you set someone's house on fire.
For more about emotions, visit: Happiness Dissected